WORDLESS WEDNESDAY: LOVING SISSY

banana foster french toast

ok i love french toast so paula deen hats off to u for this great creation even though the bananas were a bit much, my babies loved it tho!

first attempt ever at frying chicken

so good even better the next day

WHAT A 4TH

IT WAS STORMYS 1ST FOURTH OF JULY! WE WENT TO MY INLAWS. THE KIDS PLAYED HARD. RHETT REALLY ENJOYED PLAYING WITH CHRISTIAN AGAIN. HE HAD HIS PICK OF KIDS TO PLAY WITH. BETWEEN AVERY, CADEN, BOOKIE, CHRISTIAN, MADDIE AND LEXI, HE STAYED BUSY. IM GLAD HES FINALLY STARTING TO SOCIALIZE. AFTER PLAYING FOR A WHILE IT WAS TIME TO EAT. ALISON AND APRIL PRETTY MUCH DID ALL THE COOKING AND THE GRILLING. PRETTY GOOD COOKS I MUST SAY. KIDS SEEMED TO ENJOY THE MARSHMALLOW PISTACHIO SALAD. I DIDNT GET TO TRY IT THO. WE STARTED OFF THE FIREWORKS WITH THE LIL POPPERS AND SMOKE BOMBS WHICH RHETT LOVED. DIDNT REALLY CARE FOR ANYTHING ELSE THO. I HATE FIREWORKS ESPECIALLY BOTTLE ROCKETS. AND ROMAN CANDLES. IM ALWAYS AFRAID SOMEONE IS GONNA GET HURT, SO I GET MADE FUN OF FOR IT. RHETT AND I ENDED UP INSIDE AFTER A FEW OF THE LOUD POPPING ONE. IT SCARED HIM. STORMY REALLY LOVED IT ALL, BUT I HAVENT FOUND ANYTHING SHES NOT OK WITH. THE GIRLS LOVED IT ALL TOO EXCEPT FOR THE FACT MOMMA IS THE NO FUN PARENT AND I WOULDNT LET THEM DO THE CANDLES. BUT ATLEAST THEY HAVE THEIR FINGERS. LOL

big kisses

summer sliding

homemade playdoh

my babies

rhett, emma is not a pillow!

mom i can climb

getting back on the horse

mom get me out of here

lacy im going high

i like to eat mom

reading and playing i spy

coke floats make for a special day

i got style

sometimes it takes a bribe

STORMY ENJOYING THE SUNSHINE

RHETT FEEDING STORMY

MY MS EMS

EMMAS DANCE RECITAL PROGRAM

SAURKRAUT LOVER

BIKER BABY

ok mom get that camera out of my face

greatest sign ever

leggings go as bunny ears

picking wildflowers

A LIL PAINT MAKES A HAPPY GIRL

FUN FILLED FRIDAY: MY BUTT!

SEE THE BOTTLE, THIS IS HOW I SPENT MY DAY. I HAVE CLEANED. GETTING READY TO MOVE IS NOT THE FUNNEST THING EVER, BUT ITS SOMETHING WE GOTTA DO. BUT CANT REALLY PACK UNTIL I HAVE BOXES. SO I CLEANED THE DISHES THAT NEED TO GO AND THEN CLEANED MY MATTRESS (OR STARTED TOO). RHETT HAS WATCHED TV ALL DAY SO HE HAS BEEN A BLESSING TODAY. NOW AS SOON AS MY MOMMY GETS HERE WE CAN GET TO WORK PACKING THIS LIL HOUSE UP. SO READY FOR ROOM. 5 KIDS IN THIS LIL HOUSE IS CRAMPED. BUT I GUESS ILL MISS THE TRAIN GOING THRU EVERY 30 MINUTES. NOW I JUST GOTTA GET USED TO LIVING TIGHTLY AROUND PEOPLE.

RHETTS NEW BUBBLE BLOWER

THANKFUL THURSDAY

TODAY IM THANKFUL THAT ASIDE FROM THE RECENT SICKNESS MY KIDS R HEALTHY AND HAPPY
IM THANKFUL FOR MY PARENTS WHO HELP WHERE THEY CAN
IM THANKFUL RHETT SAID WET THIS WEEK AND KNOWS WHAT IT MEANS
IM THANKFUL THAT LAST SATURDAY I GOT TO SEE MY COUSIN AND HE IS SO POSITIVE AN INSPIRATION
IM THANKFUL MONDAY I GOT SOME REST.
IM THANKFUL FOR THE RAIN WE GOT LAST NIGHT SO MY TRIP TO THE PARK WITH RHETT WAS COOL.
IM THANKFUL MY HUBBY IS STILL HERE EVEN THO I DRIVE HIM NUTS DAILY.

DEJA VU

YESTERDAY I FELT I HAD WENT BACK IN TIME TO A DAY THAT I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA LOSE MY BABY GIRL. STORMY HAD A ROUGH WEEK LAST WEEK WITH BRONCHITIS, AND HER EAR HURTING. THE ANTIBIOTICS THAT SHE WAS GIVEN CAUSED A RASH ALL OVER SO HER PEDIATRICIAN TOOK HER OFF EVERYTHING AND PRESCRIBED ZYRTEC. WELL I MADE SURE THE OTHER MED WAS OUT OF HER SYSTEM BEFORE I GOT THE NEW ONE. AS I LEFT THE PHARMACY I NOTICED THAT THE PHARMACIST WROTE TAKE ONE DAILY ON A LIQUID. I CALLED AND ASKED WHAT ONE MEANT. WAS IT A TEASPOON. TABLESPOON, BOTTLE. WELL THE PHARMACIST SAID THATS SUPPOSED TO BE TEASPOON. OK IM SATISFIED. FOR THE MOMENT. I GAVE IT TO STORMY AND SHE WENT TO SLEEP THEN BECAME VERY RESTLESS CLAWING HER FACE. HER EYES MATTED OVER AND SHE DIDNT WANT TO WAKE UP BUT SHE DID FINALLY. I WENT AND CHECKED A BOTTLE OF RHETTS MEDICINE THAT WAS THE SAME AT HIOM BEING 15 MONTHS AND IT WAS 1/2 WHAT SHE WAS GIVEN. AND RHETT WAS HEAVIER THEN THAN SHE IS NOW. I CALLED THE PEDITRICAN AND WAS TOLD THEY HAD WROTE 1/2 TEASPOON ON HER PRESCRIPTION AND THE PHARMACY HAD MESSED UP. I WAS IN FULL PANIC MODE. SAMS COULDNT READ THE ORGINAL PRESCRIPTION SO THEY THOUGHT IT SAID 1. IT JUST MAKES ME MAD. MY BABY IS JUST A CUSTOMER TO THEM NO REMORSE NOTHING. THIS HAPPENED TO LEXI EXCEPT THE PHARMACIST TECH PUT 5ML INSTEAD OF .5 ML. AND LEXI ALMOST DIED. ITS SO SAD THE PEOPLE WE TRUST TO HELP US GET BETTER, REALLY DONT DOUBLE CHECK THINGS. THEY DONT WORK WITH BOOKS THEY WORK WITH LIVES. MAKES ME LEARY TO TRUST THEM AGAIN. GOOD NEWS STORMY DIDNT HAVE ENOUGH TO CAUSE DAMAGE.

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY!

MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND :(

DO U EVER JUST HATE A DAY? OR A WEEK OF THE YEAR? I KNOW I DO. EVER SINCE 2002 I HAVE HATED MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND. THE REASON WE CELEBRRATE IM ALL FOR BUT I JUST HATE THIS WEEKEND. IT REMINDS ME OF A PLACE I WAS. MY MARRIAGE TO LEXI'S DAD ENDED OVER THIS WEEKEND IN 2003 LEXI WAS ONLY 11 WEEKS OLD. I WAS SERVED PAPERS TO REAPPEAR IN COURT FOR MADDIES CUSTODY BATTLE OVER THIS WEEKEND IN 2002, I WAS ACCUSED OF EMBEZZLEMENT AT WORK THIS WEEKEND IN 2004, I ENDED MY MAKESHIFT MARRIAGE TO A "BOY" THIS WEEKEND IN 2005. MY COUSIN WHO I LOVE WAS HIT BY A CAR BY HIS WIFE THIS WEEKEND IN 2006, MADDIE HAD TO SPEND THE WEEKEND WITH HER FATHER 2007 EVEN THO IT WAS MY HOLIDAY BECAUSE IT WAS HIS SUMMER VISTATION. FROM 2008-NOW ITS BEEN OK NOT GREAT BUT OK. THIS YEAR I REALLY FELT LIKE I WAS HAVING A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN ALL WEEKEND JUST WAITING FOR THE BAD TO HAPPEN. BUT THE DAY IS ALMOST OVER SO I GUESS I'LL REST EASY. HAD FUN THIS WEEKEND: GOT THE TAT, HAD A COOKOUT WITH MY DADDY AND STEPMOM, PLAYED AT THE PARK, PLAYED IN THE SPRINKLER, SLEPT IN AND BEEN LAZY. I'LL START BACK TO CLEANING AND COOKING TOMORROW. FOR THE REST OF THE NIGHT IM JUST GONNA DO WHAT IVE DONE ALL DAY AND RELAX! PLUS MADDIE WILL B WALKING IN MY DOOR ANY MINUTE NOW AND I CANT WAIT TO HOLD HER.

SUNSHINE GIRLS

MY SINFUL SATURDAY!

YESTERDAY MY SISTERS AND I WITH STORMY VENTURED TO TULSA TO GET MATCHING TATTOOS. LETS JUST SAY I WASNT ALL EXCITED BECAUSE MY SISTERS AND I SEEM TO HAVE DRIFTED APART IN THE PAST FEW MONTHS. I WASNT INCLUDED IN THE DESIGNING OR EVEN ASKED FOR ANY OPINION ON THE SUBJECT. BUT IT WAS SOMETHING WE HAVE TALKED ABOUT FOR A WHILE NOW SO I WENT TO HAVE IT DONE. THE DESIGN IS AWESOME, THE ARTIST WAS SO AMAZING I ACTUALLY GOT TO HAVE A CONVERSATION WITH SOMEONE THAT WAS A STRANGER ABOUT RHETT WITH THEM UNDERSTANDING WITHOUT ME EXPLAINING IT ALL. MY SISTERS ASKED WHAT WAS BOTHERING ME AND I KEPT TELLING THEM NOTHING, BUT THEN THE LADY AT MCDONALDS GOT MY ORDER WRONG AND I GOT VERY MAD. AND I KNOW I WAS WRONG IN THIS BUT FOR ONCE IN A LONG TIME I WANTED TO FEEL LIKE I HAVE CONTROL OVER SOMETHING IN MY LIFE SINCE I HAVE LOST ALL SENSE OF SECURITY AND CONTROL RECENTLY WITH RHETTS DIAGNOSES. THEN I HAD A COMPLETE BREAKDOWN IN THE CAR. I KNOW I HAVE TO BE STRONG FOR MY KIDS BUT SOME DAYS I JUST WANT TO CRY AND YESTERDAY WAS ONE OF THOSE DAYS. ITS REALLY SAD TO ADMIT THAT IM JEALOUS OF EVERY LIL KID THAT RUNS THEIR MOUTHS AT 2 YEARS OLD. OR AT LEAST JEALOUS OF THEIR PARENTS. THEY GET TO HEAR THE TALKING AND GET TO TELL THEIR KIDS THAT THEY TALK TOO MUCH. I DONT WISH THIS FEELING ON ANYONE. MY SISTERS R SO FORTUNATE TO NOT HAVE TO GO THRU THIS. THEN WHEN I GOT HOME I MADE A COMMENT TO JD AND HIS RESPONSE WAS TAKEN THE WRONG WAY SO AGAIN MY MOUTH TOOK OFF. BY THE TIME I WAS DONE I WAS IN HYSTRICS AND I LOCKED MYSELF IN THE BATHROOM AND CRIED UNTIL I WAS SICK. THEN I TALKED TO MY MOM WHO HAS BEEN MY ROCK THRU ALL THE CRAP IVE BEEN THRU. SHE REASSURED ME OF EVERYTHING I ALREADY KNEW BUT I JUST NEEDED TO HEAR IT FROM SOMEONE ELSE. SHE THEN TOLD ME THAT HOW I FEEL ABOUT LONGING FOR RHETT TO TALK IS LIKE WOMEN LONG FOR A BABY AFTER THEY MISCARRY. I NEVER REALLY THOUGHT ABOUT IT THAT WAY. I JUST WANT SO MUCH FOR ALL MY KIDS, AND IF I CANT FIX IT IMMEDIATELY I START DWELLING. BUT IM HOPING I CAN START LETTING IT ALL COME AT ITS OWN PACE. AND THAT IS HOW I ENDED MY STRESSFUL, SINFUL SATURDAY

MY SISTERS TATTOO

Its family Friday: updates on all my kiddos

Maddie has been promoted to the 4th grade. So excited she bench marked past her goal. So amazing since a year ago she was at a kindergarten reading level and now shes at 4th grade. Its a wonder what finding the right teachers can do. Shes so excited it summer. To her it means the pool and more pool, and maybe sleeping in. lol. She has been instructed to read more over the summer. So im hoping that means library trips. And shes really wanting to scrapbook too so that means Hobby Lobby!
Lexi is going into the 2nd grade. So funnhy she said she was gonna quit school if she got one teacher well that teacher got moved to 1st grade so no worries there. She is way ready for summer. She thinks school is a waste of time. But now being able to be outdoors daily will make her super happy. Shes the rowdy one so i really have to watch her with the baby.
Emma has really started making herself at home here on her visits. She argues with the girls just like sisters do. As soon as she walks in the door its where r my pjs. She has been peeing her pants everyday, so its got to where i have to put Rhetts diapers on her. Still no clue why shes been doing it, but at least her sheets get cleaned daily. lol. She has had an issue with hitting Rhett so shes had to be disciplined. She left a whelp across Rhetts chest. But since that time she hasnt hit anyone. She does whine if shes told no, then we here she wants her mommy, but after about 5 minutes of no one paying attention she realizes that I dont cave to the cries. All my kids know that. She really is a sweet little girl, she loves to help me and take pictures with me. i cant wait to see how things go when shes here for 3 weeks starting june 13th.
Rhett is making so much progress in his therapy. Hes saying a few new words and everyone i hear i want to cry. Makes me so proud! Ive heard parents say the wish they could tape their kids mouths shut cause they talk so much and i used to be one like that until i longed to hear Rhett say a sentence to me. Like last night the girls kept screaming at each other and laughing and talking as loud as they could and i would tell them to keep it down but i didnt tell them to get quiet. I just ignored the commotion. Rhett has been going to the potty something they said wouldnt come until hes about 4 because of his lack of senses in that area, and i know that im making him potty, but he does start trying to take off his pull up whne he needs to go so i know when he has the urge. he is actually approaching strangers and allowing others to hold him. its a great feeling to know hes being pulled from his world into ours.
Stormy is trying to get enough courage to walk. She chickens out as soon as her hands leave whatever shes holding. I hope she starts walking before 1 tho. that gives us 6 weeks to get her courage. Wheres the wizard of oz when u need him? She has started clapping. And she likes to climb on things too. She seems to have the fear of heights thing down, she tries not to go down after she goes up, so thankful there. I wish she would say momma more than she does. Im only talked about when her feelings are hurt.:( She has had a recent case of bronchitis or so they said, and the antibiotics they gave caused a massive reaction. I have never seen my baby girl so miserable. She itched all over. And it would get worse. But today she woke up and its barely visible. so its a good friday!. I'll only do family friday updates once a month, next friday will be fun filled friday, posting pics of the fun of summer

So excited for summer programs!

The past 2 weeks have said goodbye to my shows. With that amazing season finale of Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice ending like it did makes me ready for the shows to start back along with dancing with the stars and American idol( which upsets me that Simon has left). But the Bachlorette and Secret Life of the American Teenager are here for the summer. I'm also excited about sytycd! Sounds kinda sad that I'm happy new TV shows r on. lol. but with summer shows mean summer fun too! Cant wait for days outside with the sprinkler or water park. Memorial Day cant get here fast enough for the kiddos they seriously want to head to Alma water park for some sliding fun into the pools. The girls have basketball camp next month too, along with trips to Tulsa for Rhett. i wish life had dvr so i don't miss anything!

Thankful Thursday

Saw this on a couple friends blogs and thought I would use the idea too if they dont mind.
I am thankful that bills are getting paid.
I am thankful my kids are healthy.
I am thankful my hubby is working and he loves me even at my worst.
I am thankful I found Therapy wORKS IN TULSA TO HELP RHETT WITH HIS SPD.
I A THANKFUL MY PARENTS ARE SO GREAT TO US.
I AM THANKFUL RHETT IS REALLY DOING SO WELL IN THERAPY.
i AM THANKFUL THAT ITS SUMMER AND MY BABIES GET TO STAY HOME FROM SCHOOL.

WOW WOW EVERYONE

WOW WOW EVERYONE
SO RHETT WENT BACK TO TULSA TODAY FOR ANOTHER EVALUATION. BUT WHEN WE GOT THERE THEY DECIDED THE ONE HE HAD DONE IN OKC LAST MONTH WAS RIGHT ON ON EVERYTHING THAT WAS SEEN THAT HE WAS DOING. PLUS OTHER THINGS WERE ADDED. RHETT NEEDS ATLEAST 30 HOURS A WEEK IN THERAPY AT HOME JUST FOR HIS SENSORY PART OF THERAPY. NO TELLING HOW MUCH THE SPEECH PATHOLOGIST IS GONNA WANT. RIGHT NOW WE R AT 3-4 HOURS A WEEK IN TULSA SINCE THEY R ADDING A DIETIAN THERAPIST FOR US TOO. SINCE RHETT IS SO PICKY AND WILL ONLY EAT ABOUT 5 BITES AT ONCE. (WOULDNT EVER KNOW HE WAS PICKY SINCE HES 2 AND WEIGHS OVER 40 POUNDS) HES ON NUTRIENT SHAKES AND DETOXIFY MEDS. TRYING TO CLEAN OUT ALL THE JUNK IN HIS SYSTEM. OUR THERAPIST TODAY WAS RACHEL AND OMG SHE WAS SO AMAZING. TALK ABOUT RHETT REALLY HAVING A BLAST. THEN AGAIN I HAVENT SEEN ONE THERAPIST THERE THAT WASNT SO DEVOTED TO THE KIDS THEY R HELPING. RHETT CLIMBED UP ON THE TREE HOUSE AND SHE STARTED SHAKING IT AND SCREAMING AT HIM LIKE A BANCHE AND RHETT WOULD RUN THEN COME BACK AT HER LIKE HE WAS GONNA SCREAM BACK. THEN HE WOULD JUST GIGGLE AND THROW HIMSELF DOWN THE SLIDE. RHETT IS SHOWING SIGNS ON BEING ON THE AUTISM SPECTRUM BUT SHE SAID RIGHT NOW IF I WAS TO TEST HIM AND HIM BE ON IT THAT IT WOULD "LABEL" HIM, AND SHE FEELS LIKE IN 6 MONTHS SINCE RHETT SHOWS SUCH GREAT PROMISE ON WANTING TO TALK AND KNOW WHAT HES DOING THAT HE WONT BE ON IT AND I WOULD HAVE LABELED HIM WITHOUT JUST CAUSE SINE YOU CAN HAVE SPD WITHOUT AUTISM BUT U CANT HAVE AUTISM WITHOUT SPD. AND SHE FEELS LIKE HES JUST SPD. AND FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE RHETT WAS 6 MONTHS OLD I WAS OK WITH THAT ANSWER. AT HOME WE HAVE TO DO 6 30 MINUTE SESSIONS OF SENSORY INTERACTION A DAY ALONE. SO STORMY AS OF TODAY HAS A BABYSITTER WHO SHE WAS FUSSY FOR THE FIRST 3 HOURS and WAS FINE THE OTHER 3. SHE WILL BE GOING 3 DAYS A WEEK SO I CAN CLEAN AND WORK WITH RHETT DURING THE DAY ALL BY OURSELVES WITHOUT A LIL SIS CHASING US AROUND. LOL. WE R ALSO FIXING TO ADD A SCREENED IN PORCH THERAPY ROOM ON TO THE HOUSE SO RHETT CAN B OUTSIDE WITHOUT BEING OUTSIDE. IT WILL B BIG ENOUGH TO GIVE HIM THE HUGE BALL PIT AND SLIDE AND POSSIBLY A WOODEN SWING AND OTHER SENSORY THINGS HE NEEDS. IM HOPING IT WILL KEEP HIM OCCUPIED SOME. SO LOOKING FORWARD TO ALL THESE CHANGES THAT R GONNA TAKE PLACE IN OUR LIVES. THE GIRLS ARE ALREADY SIGNING UP FOR THEIR 30 MINUTES WITH RHETT (WHICH REALLY AMOUNTS TO 10 MINUTES). JD IS GETTING SO INVOLVED WITH IT ALL TOO, WHICH I THINK IS THE MOST AMAZING THING HE HAS EVER DONE. RHETT HAS REALLY BONDED WITH HIM THIS PAST MONTH. AND AS WE FIND OUT MORE I WILL KEEP UPDATING.

mind going wild

I SWEAR IN LIFE WHEN U THINK U HAVE EVERYTHING IN THE CALM THINGS JUST ERUPT AND UR MIND IS OVERWHELMED AGAIN. 3 WEEKS AGO MADDIE CAME HOME FROM A VISIT WITH HER NANA AND DAD AND TOLD THAT THEY HAD TAKEN HER TO HER ATTORNEY TO TRY TO GET HIS VISITATION REINSTATED. WELL IT REALLY UPSET MADDIE BECAUSE THEY JUST SPRANG IT ON HER AND PUT HER ON THE SPOT. SHE MISSED 2 DAYS OF SHOOL BECAUSE OF IT SHE COULDNT SLEEP AND HER STOMACH HURT JUST LIKE IT USED TO BEFORE VISITS STOPPED. WELL AFTER 2 WEEKS OF WAITING I FINALLY GOT TO GO TALK TO THE ATTORNEY AND NOW STARTING THIS COMING WEEKEND MADDIE GOES BACK TO HER DADS FOR THE FIRST TIME IN OVER A YEAR. BUT IF MADDIE ISNT OK THERE SHE DOESNT HAVE TO GO BACK. I JUST REALLY HOPE AND PRAY THAT HE HAS USED THIS YEAR TO IMPROVE HIS LIFE SO SHE CAN BE HAPPY BECAUSE THATS ALL I REALLY WANT FOR HER. I HATE HER FATHER BUT THATS BETWEEN HIM AND ME. I WANT HER TO FEEL SAFE AND HAPPY THERE.
RHETT WENT TO THE SPEECH THERAPIST TODAY AND I WAS TOLD HE IS MEASURING AT 15 MONTHS ON HIS VOCAL ABILITIES. THATS ALMOST 14 MONTHS BEHIND. I KNEW HE WAS BEHIND IN SPEECH AND I JUST CANT SEE HOW 2 PEDATRICIANS DIDNT NOTICE. HIS ORAL MOTOR SKILLS ARE ALSO DELAYED BECAUSE OF HIS SPD. SO NOT ONLY WILL HE BE RECEIVING SPEECH HE WILL BE RECEIVING MOUTH SKILLS TO BUILD UP HIS JAWS AND TONGUE. SHE SAID THAT HE UNDERSTANDS WHAT IS BEING SAID JUST CANT EPRESS HIS WORDS AND THAT WE HAVE TO B MORE INTERESTING THAN THE TOYS HE PLAYS WITH BECAUSE THE TOYS R GIVING HIM INPUT THAT HE NEEDS FROM HIS SURROUNDINGS WHERE IM NOT WHEN IM TALKING. SO IN ORDER FOR US TO MOVE FORWARD WE HAVE TO FIGURE OUT WAYS TO KEEP HIS ATTENTION ON US FOR HIM TO RECOGNIZE THE WORDS WE R SAYING. BUT SHE SAID THAT IT WOULD ALL COME ONCE HIS OCCUPATIONAL THERAPY GETS STARTED NEXT WEEK. IM SO HOPING THAT SOON MY SON CAN HAVE A CONVERSTAION WITH ME. HE HAS THE SWEETEST VOICE. EVERY NEW WORD IS SO WORTH THE CELEBRATION TO ME. I DANCE AND CRY WHEN SOMETHING NEW IS SAID. I KNOW THAT FOR PEOPLE THAT HAVE KIDS THAT DO THINGS ON TIME THAT IT SOUNDS STUPID THAT I WANTED TO HAVE A PARTY WHEN RHETT SAID COW TODAY. I WANTED TO ROLL DOWN MY WINDOW AND TELL THE CARS NEXT TO ME THAT MY SON SAW AND SAID COW. I WENT TO HIS THERAPY SESSION TODAY AND WATCHED OTHER PARENTS THAT KNEW WHAT I FELT LIKE FOR SUCH A SMALL THING. A MAN WAS OVER THE TOP ALMOST IN TEARS WHEN HE WAS TOLD THAT HIS SON WALKED DOWN STAIRS WITH ONLY THE HANDRAIL GUIDING HIM. AND A MOTHER WAS HI FIVING HER DAUGHTER BECAUSE SHE SAID "SHE SLID DOWN THE SLIDE". I WAS SO AMAZED AT THE DIFFERENT ATMOSPHERE INSIDE THERAPY WORKS. I CANT WAIT TO GO BACK. IM SO GLAD THAT THEY ARE ONLY AN HOUR AND A HALF AWAY THAT RHETT WILL BENEFIT. I JUST WISH I LIVED IN TULSA SO HE COULD GO EVERYDAY.
NOW THAT IVE PUT SOME OF MY THOUGHTS DOWN, MY MIND SEEMS TO BE CLEARING UP A LIL BIT. IM BEGINNING TO THINK I NEED A BIGGER BRAIN SO IT DOESNT FEEL SO FULL AND JUMBLED ALL THE TIME. JD TELLS ME TO QUIT THINKING ABOUT THINGS BUT THATS LIKE TELLING PAM ANDERSON HER BOOBIES R SMALL. LOL. JUST ISNT GONNA HAPPEN IM THE MOM ITS WHAT I DO. MOM = MATTERS ON MIND. I TOLD MY MOM THAT I NEED A SLEEPING PILL BUT IT WOULD NEED TO BE ABOUT 12 TIMES THE DOSE FOR IT TO WORK THEN I WOULD PANIC THINKING I WOULDNT WAKE UP SO THEN I JUST WOULDNT TAKE IT. MAYBE I JUST NEED A BOTTLE OF RUM AND ILL FORGET WHAT IS GOING ON, BUT I DONT WANT THE HEADACHE ON TOP OF THE HEADFUL.

Rhett's diagnoses

Try this: Turn on the radio, then turn it up as loud as it will go. Until it hurts your ears. Put 150 watt light bulbs in every lamp in one room, and turn them all on. Put on a pair of pants backwards and somebody else's shoes that are too small. Shove a stiff hairbrush down the back of your shirt, so it is poking at you, and driving you crazy. Now clean the kitty litter, change the dirty baby diaper, or scoop up the dog mess in the yard, and sit it square in the middle of the table, so it wafts. Sit at your table with a food you absolutely gag on, in a chair with one leg missing. Now, snack on that food you hate. How many seconds can you stand the music that loud? The lights so bright? Those shoes so tight? And what is that smell!? Imagine if you cannot stop this. Cannot have a moment, ever, without feeling like you do right now.

Now imagine you are just a little kid, who does not know that it isn't like this for everybody. Now, imagine you are an adult who has no idea why they feel this way.


Ever wonder why your child is the way they are? I have wondered about Rhett since he was 6 months old. Why my son never wanted me to leave his sight, why my son never cried during shots, why my son wasnt sitting up or looking at people. Why my son literally had to be beat to burp, why he had such stomach issues. At 3 weeks we went to eat at El Chicos and my husband went to change him on the floor with our changing pad. Rhett lifted his head and smashed it into concrete, he whimpered but never cried. This is a newborns fragile head and it didnt phase him. ER said he was fine no marks no damage, just watch him. At 2 months he got his shots and never even made a sound the nurse said it was cause he had a paci in his mouth. 4 and 6 months were the same way, at a year he got his finger pricked got mad at the lady for touching him but never cried when she stuck him. Rhett always cried when my mother in law came near him. It was only her. Everyone else he didnt have a problem with. My husband could never keep him until recently. No one could. I was told my son is spoiled needs a spanking needs me to put him down needs me to tell him no, but turns out he needed me. At 1 year he wasnt showing any interest in walking, he took his first step at 10 months, then didnt even try until he was 14 months old. Rhett said mama at 6 months but his vocabulary is now only about 20 words. He uses his words that he does know to make sentences but not like the other 2 year olds i know. At 2 i asked if he was behind was told since there r so many siblings its just harder for him to talk everyone does it for him. On Christmas Eve he laid himself out and never cried had a bruise within 5 minutes across his throat where he clotheslined but was more upset he got slowed down than the fact he was hurt. Hes got a high pain tolerance i was told, and they r right.
March 18th Rhett was diagnosed with a neurological disorder called spd: sensory processing disorder. It is genetic and regarding my husband was probably passed from his side. Spd explained everything all the way down to the issue with my mother in law her voice literally was hurting his ears. By the time it processed to his brain it was worse than it is. Raising my voice scares him, he cant go to daycare unless its one specialized in this. he requires constant attention for he might climb and jump or break a bone without even noticing. Every fall is a physical for him we have to check everything to make sure nothings broke he might not even notice. He might not potty train for a while becuz he cant realize the urge. It scares the crap out of me. What scares me more is that there is no cure that he might not ever "function" like he should or that he will be made fun of because hes different. People r so cruel. And im not even talking about school kids i'm talking about family too. Im thankful my family has been so supportive of RHETT. I know he doesnt talk like the other kids in the family, I know he doesnt act like the other kids in the family. But its not his fault he cant help it.AND i know he might not ever get to be a part of things like i want but my son is the most loving child ever. and that i will always be so thankful for. Hes got the love down. This has been the most trying time i have ever experienced in my whole life. But now that i know what we have to do rhett is gonna be the best he can be. And i swear if i find out people r talking about my son and its not in a good way i will rip faces off. Im not making fun of anyones kids and i dont care if its ever a playful thing if its a joke or not i will react like its war. if theres an urge to make fun of someone make fun of me call me names do whatever but my son and all my kids r off limits.